Here to Stay
Maybe you noticed
that twinge of insecurity in your stomach,
that flutter of fear in your heart,
those tremors of uncertainty in your hands,
especially right before you fall asleep, when I am strongest.
I have noticed the rattle of prescriptions hidden deep in your purse,
"just in case" you need them.
Whether or not you want to admit it,
sooner or later
you WILL need them.
I will make you need them.
I am your anxiety,
I am the panic that attacks you
randomly, frequently, haphazardly,
during your classes, at work,
in the car, relaxing at home.
Wherever you go,
I'm there
waiting, lurking.
I like to torture you
and I'm here to stay.
You try to erase me
with those fancy little pills
as soon as you notice
the shaking in your limbs
and that drop in your stomach
that I have created.
Those tic-tac like weapons
may medicate me into submission
this time,
but we both know
I am more persistent than that.
I will be back again.
I CHOSE You,
remember?
Because you were a little too self-confident,
because you didn't see me coming
and neither did anyone else around you.
Because someone had to get in your way
and I decided to assert myself as that someone.
Anxiety is just my weapon of choice.